I’ve finally made a plan for Australia which I look forward to, solved some communicational problems with people and have almost everything done to sell or at least rent out my apartment.
Before Australia I have one month in the Philippines, and I’ve already booked a ticket from there to Australia because they have a 30 day visa limit in the Philippines where you have to show a outbound ticket on arrival, which is fine because I really look forward to Australia.
- Workaway in Sydney Jan-May, hopefully by a surfbeach
- Surf or run every weekday morning
- Gymnastics & ballet classes on weekdays after work
- Enroll on Jordan Petersons online university and spend time at the public library
- NIDA acting courses at certain weekends
- Excursions in nature other weekends
- NIDA 2-3 week residency in June – Advanced actors or Musical theatre
- Gain enough contacts in order to do some acting jobs
- Get sponsored to work or decide to work at a farm for 3 months so that I can get a second year of visa
^all this in Sydney if nothing else happens, deadline June.
People keep asking me if I want to have a degree in acting, but I have decided to continue taking courses at well-known schools (NIDA for instance) and then might take a degree in humaniora instead. I’ve been truly inspired by Dr Jordan Peterson this fall and he’s about to open an online university focused on humaniora which I hope to enroll on, but we’ll see.
Meanwhile I’m getting some work done in Malmö, I’ve been on two different shortmovie sets for two days and have been able to organize my apartment a little bit. I’m still surprised about what the decorator did with my apartment in a few hours that I’ve been trying to do for years. Surely she used a lot of the things that I already have, so the basics where there, but she just had the eye to recognize how to make it even more beautiful.
I’m a creative person but we need eachother to help finish our talents, and that became very obvious to me now. There are times where I’ve been surrounded by people who made me feel ashamed of my ideas and visions, and I’ve therefore been afraid to listen to others, but I think I’ve found a way to handle it now.
There’s a fine balance between interdependence, dependence and independence. You need to be able to know yourself and your limits while listening to others, an art in itself. Marshall Rosenberg lectures about non-violent communication has truly helped me with this since he teaches you how to understand peoples needs aswell as expressing your own, where the goal is for both needs to be met. I’ve used his language a lot lately and it has opened new loving doors with friends and family which feels amazing.
I’ve also noticed how my understanding and wisdom around difficult questions regarding art, psychology and religion has increased lately, and I thank God for it because it shows me how everything is worth the drive, motivation and effort. He put the desire in my heart and I go for it because I know Him and trust Him no matter what people say. Especially other Chrisitans can be critical sometimes but knowing Him more makes me feel confident.
I’ve been thinking a lot about my art lately realising that what I love about acting/film/theatre is when you truly recognize yourself with the story and the characters. If that recognition also can inspire the audience to a better life it’s a blessing. How can I create characters that people can identify with? First of all the script has to have the basics, my responsibility as an actress is to get deeper with my character so it becomes more alive and human.
Reading The Power of the Actor has opened my eyes regarding this and how much an actress can contribute and even change the whole script by working with the character. If I continue to study these methods together with psychology and develope my eye for what a good basic story is, I might aswell get there. I believe in my acting because I’ve experienced how people in the business appreciate my work, and my inner motivation is driving me further which is a great feeling to live by.
We all try to add some basic goodness to whatever we’re dedicated to, but we still need eachother to get there. Being in an environment where you feel less than you are can be very destructive, but it can also work as a motivator to find something better. Everything is possible if we find the right place and the right people to reach the impossible with, but in order to find that we need to define our vision and what we actually want.
Seeing my apartment now makes me realise that I did my best to create this momentum, and it reached its fullest potential by someone else coming in and making the final work. I see it as symbolic for everything else in life, I try my best to do my part and can then let someone else help finish the work.